Do You Have Control On Your Tears?

"When someone is crying, of course, the noble thing to do is to comfort them. But if someone is trying to hide their tears, it may also be noble to pretend you do not notice them."

~Lemony Snicket

I read this so long ago but it's stuck somewhere in my mind. So, let me speak on it so that I can focus on some other stucked things.

This quote. What is it about?

People showing and hiding their tears.

People noticing and ignoring the same.

Doing the good and bad.

Doing the right and wrong.

I don't think there's much to say on this because the quote speaks loud itself.

But it does remind me of something and that is something to speak about.

Ready for a lil' story?

Here you go. 

I was 8 years old. It was a PT period --or say, activities period-- in which we, students, were playing something. I was running while some other kid was chasing me --he would touch me and I lose, that was the game-- and me not being sporty at all, wasn't used to running and I fell. Scraped my knees. I could see blood in multiple thin lines' pattern. It was the first time I saw blood. I remember the hurt. The kid stopped in time so he didn't fall but touched me. I lost (-the game) . The teachers saw us --me, on ground-- and came running. They asked me if I was okay. I nodded keeping my eyes on the wound. They saw the blood before the nod and asked me if it is paining. I had tears in my eyes but I didn't let them fall on my cheeks. I didn't cry. I remember them taking me to the medical room and asking me again and again for if it's paining and at last, I was like: Lil' bit. 

I remember not crying.

i don't believe while telling you this that it's ME in this story, cause that kid sounds way braver than the now-version of me

but okay, i'm telling you my own story so can't be not me and ofcourse that kid being braver than me is another topic i'm stucked on

continuing story: 

Fast forward to the dispersal time.

Mum asked me about the white dressing on my knee. And, I remember keeping my tears in control. 

Fast forward to the dinner time.

Dad came home. He asked the same and my- my tears flowed even before me telling anything to him. 

gawd, am i really telling you this?

I told him then. We had dinner later.

story over

Wonder what does this have to do with the quote?

This quote reminded me of this memory. To emphasize on the fact: When you see someone's tears and you're confused if to comfort them or pretend not to notice, comforting them is the correct answer most of the times. Because you know, we say that I couldn't control my tears, but is that really the case?

Why our tears don't get out of control in front of our parents when it's about our secret relationship?

How do our tears get in control on a stage where we're supposed to give a presentation when we have just received the most disastrous news of our lives?

Because, we somehow have some control on our tears.

When we say we don't have control on our tears, it's when we've let them out. We have control till they're inside us. Once, they're flowing, that's the point where control gets out of our hands.

We have control over the situation in which we allow them to flow.

We know we want to tell this story to this person and we might cry in front of them because somewhere in our heart, we really do want to tell them the story, even if we don't accept it, even if we ain't ready for it.

Whenever you think you saw someone's tears, just make sure that you don't give them the chance of regretting the decision. The decision of them showing their tears.

That's a different thing if you can't comfort them. But, there are things you can do which would make the other person immediately regret showing their pain to you.

Don't be that person.

People are already full of realisations and regrets. You don't need to add more to the lot.

If you think that every bad thing that has happened before to you has no effect over you, just think about if you've cried over it?

If you haven't grieved over something that hurt you, darling, you're in escape.

If crying doesn't help, maybe sharing would. 

You don't need to pick up your phone, turn on the torch and go looking for the person right now. But. Whenever you feel something right about the person --and the moment-- don't hold back.

There are some people who genuinely want to know about you. Even if it's a story that happened seven years ago. If they knew that the seven years ago experience is haunting you, the right person --the one who wants good for you-- would do anything to get you speak it out while trying their best to keep you in your comfort zone.

And how do you know if the person is genuinely interested in knowing about you and wants good for you?

You just do. There's no written rule.

if there would be, that would have been the starting of this write-up

Also, these people who want good for you. Gawd, get a chain and tie them to you.

hehe, not to be taken literally

Just, keep them close to you, okay? They really are the best kind of people you'll ever meet.

Hope you get this person soon.

Hope you become someone's best person too.

I don't know about if you're someone's best person or not, but you definitely are your own best person.

Smile, darling. 

~Miss V