Are We Trapped By Our Minds?

Hellooooo, people.

"When you're born in a burning house, you think the whole world is on fire. But it's not."

~Richard Kadrey, Aloha from Hell 

First of all, how much beauty people put in their sentences is one of the things I can't stop appreciating. 

look at this quote, damn

Let's talk about this quote. There are a lot of ways people grasp a certain line. I'll tell you mine for this one.

What I thought of after reading this quote is: When we're in a terrible situation, we tend to stop looking the other way around. If your house is burning, what are you supposed to do? Look for how to extinguish the fire, maybe. Or run for the exit. Or if the door is closed, try to break it. Or if it doesn't get opened still, call out for help through the window.

You can think of ten more solutions in this moment. But, when we would actually be in a burning house, we would run out of options. We don't have as many solutions in that moment as we would have right now. And it's alright. You're allowed to panic.

This quote hits me hard mainly because it's about us being trapped by our own minds.  Getting the most feasible way out of a difficult situation is not a 'gift' to people. It's not just 'it's just the way they are.'  If someone can remain calm under pressure, it's not their 'genes.' It's their mind. And, no. Your mind isn't as different as you think it is. There might be things you think you can't do. But, keeping calm in a hard situation is something that is achievable. You wouldn't have to spend millions or have to witness a volcanic eruption to be able to achieve that. What you'll have to do is to practice to tell your brain the right things.

as if we don't try to do it

Yes, you definitely try doing that and it's not fun being scared or panicky. But the thing is you realize only in the most difficult situations that you get vulnerable and when the situation gets better, you don't feel enough pressure to work on it. The day you'll realize that you've to work on the level of your panic, calmness, anger or any other undesirable feeling, you're already half way through.

how do we cover the rest half?

"The night isn't dark; the world is dark. Stay with me a little longer."

~Louise Glück, from Departure; Meadowlands, 1996

 

Does this quote give you any idea?

lemme tell you

Considering the topic we're on, this quote fits so well. In any other topic, I might not have mentioned this quote to you because it says the world is dark but here, I can mention it. Because I myself stated above, when we're in a difficult situation, the world --the world in front of our eyes only-- appears dark. We tend to look at the closed curtains and it takes a long time for us to realize that they can be drawn and windows can be opened to let in the sunshine.

So, back to how to get a control on the level of your calmness during a difficult situation? Just as the quote suggests, stay with someone who calms you down. If they ain't available at the moment, think of what would they say if they were present? There are things that they would say to you. Maybe, to take deep breaths? Have some water? Tell yourself that it's all gonna be okay? and so on.

When you know how someone calms you or how you ease things for someone else, remind yourself that you're aware of the right things to tell yourself.

Next thing is: why is it so difficult to tell the right things to ourselves when we do it so perfectly to others? If someone comes to you for advice on something that you yourself are going through, you'd probably give one of the best advices to them. You're going through the same thing acts as a plus point when you're advising. Then, why doesn't giving your best advice act as a plus point for calming yourself down? Why don't you tell yourself the things you advise others?

because it's difficult? because it just doesn't happen?

Darling, we're talking about you getting trapped by your own mind, what gave you hope that it's going to be easy?

i  know i didn't

And about 'it just doesn't happen'? Honey, it doesn't because you're not in practice. You might have stayed calm in a lot of difficult scenarios and you should be proud of yourself for that. But, remind yourself that you need to practice to stay calm. It won't happen overnight. It will take time but the time starts when you'll start doing that. If you start telling yourself the right things and stop after sometime --without realizing it-- you might end up complaining about time getting passed and you're not achieving anything.

So, remember whenever you think you're not making any progress in achieving what you want to, it's time to look back and reflect upon how far you've come. You'd either be proud of yourself or will realize that the efforts you're putting in are lesser than what they were at the beginning.

I hope you become consistent in the process of keeping yourself calm and get yourself so practiced that even if you get to know the world is ending, you can still go somewhere to give yourself a food treat.

hehe, just kidding

it's an indirect reminder though, to pamper yourself

In case, you don't take indirect reminders, I'm explicitly telling you to pamper yourself. Have some peaceful moments with yourself; you deserve it.

~Miss V